Please help me with relationship stuff!
 

I need the help of kind of realthinship experinced guys and possibly girls, any help would be helpful. Sorry if this is returining to an old topic+ its not magic related but I need help! Me and this girl have been friends for almost a year now and are quite close, we hug each other often (although she hugs everyone but I think me close to most, Im not sure) we have held hands a few times, once when we where both crying (we where performing our peoms in english and so many of them where sad), another time when my stomach was cramping up (I have stomach problems and I get awful cramps and she held my hand until I felt better) and another time just for the hell of it. And lately she has kissed me, on the cheek, forhead and thisafternoon when giving each other our see ya tommorow hugs a kiss o the neck and I am trying to work out weather she likes (as in like like) me or not, and wether I her. HELP

I don't know how that works in Australia, but over here it would've been way obvious that she likes you by kissing you everywhere. ;)

OR very commonly, girls who are very comfortable with guys and see them like brothers will engage in such actions. Girls can be really confusing like that. :hm:

That was my first thought when reading the beginning, but a kiss on the neck shouldn't be part of that. Anyhow, you can always take it slowly and see how far she takes it herself if you don't want to take any risk. :)

Oh, didn't read the kiss on the neck part XD Yeah, what Mark said :D

Judging by her actions and my vast (in)experience on the matter, I'd say she definitely likes you!

well, one would easily suspect that she likes you, there's a very simple way to confirm that, when you two are alone, try, very subtly( or not) to try and make an advancement on her, and see how she reacts to the very first advancement because at the first one, she is caught off guard, and will react in a way she deems suitable( if she blushes, or gives no resistance to it, that would be a YES). Try and do it without hesitation, or better yet, do it like you really like her and can't contain yourself. there are many ways to make an advancement from where you guys are at, but i can't really suggest a way... since only you yourself know all the details necessary to decide a method. GL kieran

last time I tried that I got rejected. :( Turns out it was all a mind game. That Fin guy really knows how to toy with a man's emotions! :eek:

I was sittting with her in english today and we where doing silent work (exam practice) and I finished my practice essay early, because she was reading and her hand was on the desk and I had finshed my essay and we werent reading it out loud or handing it up for marks, I spent about five minutes summing up the courage to place my hand on hers, and I finally managed it (she ussaly intiates the hand holding) and she didnt reject me push me away or give me any kind of look she just let it rest there and kind of start to rub my hand with her thumb then when I moved my hand she kind of loocked her pinky around mine (sorry if to much details) and we stayed like that until the end of th lesson and on the way to our next she reach into mine again didnt last very long this time tough because we had to go diffrent ways, but yeah...I think I like her but yeah Im not sure if she likes me or not.

Man this realthonship stuff is stressful. There is another problem, we only have very few days of school left before holdiays for about 8 weeks, so if something is to happen or one of us is to say something we need to asap, or the holidays will begin and we wont see each other much and son on.

why don't you just ask her to go on a supposed friendly date, like hanging out during the holidays? you can confess then.

that may work la, but confesing feelings to myself is one thing (very difficult fo rme to do) but to another well thats a whole other story

Do you have her number? If you don't ask for her number so you can keep in contact with her over the break, that's an easier way to keep in contact if you're kinda shy.

Texting or calling and talking on the phone is good, because it isn't straight out declaring that u like her, its like a baby step. And then of course u can flirt through texting! flirting kinda leaves a message to her subconcious saying that i like you, without plain out saying it.

A lesson for all guys best learned early in life: girls are nothing but TROUBLE.

No, seriously. what you waiting for man? The way you described your predicament you've nothing to worry about, she sounds like a nice, young lady.

Best wishes for the holidays, and behave yourselves ;);)

it's the same for everyone, don't worry, you don't really have anything to lose if you do confess( well, you wouldn't if you have as little sensitivity as i do). i'd suggest to stand in front of a mirror and practice confessing... but that doesn't help much so i won't, instead, i suggest on a day where you decides to confess, write so on a piece of paper, and keep it with you the whole day, as well as keep yourself looking as clean as possible, that way, you'd have the most confidence as well as the most determination when you finally confess.

P.S: well, don't worry if you can't tho, everyone gets nervous about this stuff, just know that you might not ever be able to overcome the hurdle if you don't do it right when you're still young.

Ok Fin's here.. Everything's gonna be ok now! I feel really bad for you dude, since you sound just like me. I'm not sure how old you are but when I was at school, nearly up till the end, I was very, VERY insecure about myself, not at all confident, and especially around girls! It sometimes felt like torture. I think many guys are like this. Many aren't of course and seem to naturally just spawn girlfriends like a manga monster spawns tentacles when he finds a virgin! It's sickening to watch but us shy guys must suffer it all the same. So here's my simple tips to hopefully help get you out of this situation...

1) The time for THINKING is now over. Ever had the feeling you've thought about something over and over and over? It's easy to do. STOP going over in your head what could happen, how nervous you should be, what she might say, etc.. etc.. Just walk up to her and ask her if she fancies going out with you as your girlfriend. Say something like "I reckon we'd have fun together", and give her a nice smile. And kablam! Before you know it you'll be sat in the back of cinema with her wrapped around your hot dog!
2) You can worry for half your life about stuff that never even happens! :eek: And then worry about how much time you wasted worrying! :eek: :eek: Give yourself permission to say NO to negative thoughts. Just ignore them.. move on, think POSITIVE only and more positive things will come your way. The occasional worry or negative thought is natural, but then just acknowledge them and move on..
3) You are a very cool guy. Stop thinking about this as CONFESSING. That is the wrong word to be using for this. You have nothing to confess. In fact, WHEN you ask her out, which I think will be very soon, you will be doing her a favour, right? Because you're gonna be good for her. You will not be confessing, but OFFERING yourself, the man of her dreams! Think positive!! Place yourself on a new stage! Command your future!!
4) So what's the worst that can happen? She says no. It would be a shame but not the end of the world. How best to think about this? Well, if she says no then it's obviously not "meant to be", and frankly anyone who turns you down is not ready for you, or doesn't deserve you. Make it work for you.. don't let it knock you down. But it sounds like (4) won't apply, since she sounds pretty interested to me! So I say, go for it, and sooner rather than later or you may miss your chance. You only live once ;)

Dude.

Listen to Fin. and sorry Fin but I am one of those manga monsters [and i only use one tentacle ;D]

but anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyy

KIERAN!!!!! DUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDEEEEEEE. duddddddeeee. dude.
If we were bro's and digeroo buds, I would personally have slapped you like half a year ago man.

you NEED to and MUST start becoming more social with this girl dude. Honestly man, if a girl would be willing to kiss me on the neck and submissively [use her pinkie] approach you, [girls are clever dude, but men are smart. remember that]

GO FOR IT. that's it man.

I dont know how old you are, or what your limitations in a relationship status the either you entail, but for one thing, she is comfortable around you. That is perfect man, [high five]

Because she has this "comfort" vibe when she's with you, you can [honestly] be your own loser and keep YOURSELF in the friend zone, or tease her ideas about you [and who knows, maybe she'll spin you for a ride] and do what I like to call "push/pull".

Its a technique that I dont remember who first quoted it, but its older than written language Ill tell you that. Its one of the main one night stand pick up techniques and actually something you find in a lot of 'mentalism' and mind control. But really its just how you react to her.

SOOOOO by all that useless ramble ^ start off by continuing your own routine with how you do things. If you guys hang at certain places or times or whenever. If you guys chill hard core already its perfect, because what I suggest you do is put her in comfortable locations with private settings [where its you two guys, literally or not, just make your moment between the two of you] and push that intimacy to an extent where you feel the moment is over and then back off, "pull away". and repeat until you get to where you want to go with it.

So with what I said Fin basically covered the you part. Because in truth, relationships requires two things.

1)You
2)girl

so if you master you and understand how to manipulate yourself and your thoughts/vibes, then GET A GIRL [duh?!]

The hard part is actually the girl though. and you dont even have to worry, because the secret to getting anywhere with a girl is how comfortable she is around you. If you can get her to kiss you on the neck because she wants to let you know she wants to taste you.......

[see this is when i slap you]

so go for it buds. and remember you have to be smart of the clever mind

I think this wraps up everything that needs to be said. Ketchup or Mustard anyone? :surprised:

ummmmmmm, why dont we get a little nasty and use mayo tonight ;D

guys guys, he's in school, he's 16-17 and he's Australian, things like that shouldn't happen as easily as it does in America...

that said, go for it Kieran, we're all praying for you

thankyou guys!
I do have some news on this topic:
I had a judo grading tonight, I was not being garded I was going to be a backup uki (someone getting thrown by the person getting garded) just incase I got hurt. Anyway I invited her to come along and she did, and we held hands again, spoke for a while and when she had to leave I walked outside with her (she asked me to, I would of anyway though) and when we got to the street corner we hugged and then...kissed...on the front of the face....on the lips...

---------- Post added at 11:45 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:38 PM ----------

She said she really enjoyed it and it was the first kiss she always wanted :)
And I am trying to arrnage a date with her next week, wish me luck fellas.

---------- Post added 11-26-2011 at 12:07 AM ---------- Previous post was 11-25-2011 at 11:45 PM ----------

Okay yes we are going to go out next wednesday (we will have finished school then) and we shall give it a shot.
Im so happy!!! and a little nervous.
But as far as I can tell I am a terrible kisser...better start practcing now! *moves towars mirror to beign practcing*

---------- Post added at 12:25 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:07 AM ----------

I just messaged her bassicaly saying all that I felt I needed to, her reply will hopefully be reavling abotu who she feels about me and wether she really wants to give this a shot! I just really hope she does

---------- Post added at 12:26 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:25 AM ----------

Im just really nevervous about kissing her again...

---------- Post added at 12:37 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:26 AM ----------

DANM! I have exams next week which means I will be studying all weekend, which will be hard with her on my mind...and that feeling of her kssing me...
Sorry guys I should shut up

Atta Boy Kieran! Live live to the fullest! =)

XD


thats cute dude. [high five man]

i feel like we're playing the "train man" game XD( check on google). what do you mean you're a terrible kisser? do you actually know what they actually meant by the cherry stem story?( if you can tie a cherry stem with your tongue, you're a good kisser) don't worry about it( about practice kissing...i have a hard time imagining how you'd do that XD).

well, congratz Kieran, and GL on your date, and your exams as well

Thankyou guys. Sorry for brining my problems down on all you.
Yeah I was talking to her today and she said that she was happy that we kissed and that we are going out *fist pump* and she posted this abou me on her tumblr "never cared for or considered like he does" Im very happy at the moment.
Anyway thankyou guys for helping, i aprrecate it.
Now of to exam study!

do it bro!

Totally awesome!!!!!!!! On worrying about the kissing.. again, stop thinking about it. When it happens it'll be great, and trust me, sounds like you'll both get plenty of practise soon enough! ;)

Yeah!
For some reason I am having trouble grappling with all this, reason being its never hppened to me before, and I have liked this girl for so long and thought I wasnt good enough for her, and then...well yeah.
Anyway I was speaking to her online, and planing the arrngments for wednesday (our date) and I said so this is actually going to happen, and she like yes, need another kiss to prove it. That made me very happy. Anyway after disccsuing a bit more she said she wanted me to kiss her rather than other way around, but...I have no idea how to. So if you wanted to kiss someone and you knew they wouldnt reject you...how would you guys go about doing that? Lik I am thinking that when we are in the movies just put my hand on her shoulder to get her to look at me, and then do it then. I dont know...help me with this maybe aswell fellas

Kieran, since you got it in the bag, I suggest grabbing her like a man and then kissing her! :grin: Sometimes, girls like to feel that their man is in control! ;)

Say, in an Italian-English Accent with a rose in your mouth, "Oh~ Baby~ Yoo rook so fine tonight~ MOAH! *using the typical hand to mouth Italian gesture for saying 'delicious'* Bon Appetit!" *SMOOOOOOOOCH~*"

On the other hand, don't do that hahahahaha. But seriously... consider it. :thinking:

^

ok man. L O F@#$ing L dude.

I agree with Albert dude. You should dress up with a mexican porno mustache and everything XD

but honestly man, don't listen to how people kiss, you won't learn anything. Since she knows you have enough experience for her to tease you about it, learn as you go.

But really dude, [through experience] the soft intensity kissing and low growl touching is always a good go, do what you want to do, but be so delicate about it. [Kick up the intensity at times if you're daring ;D]

So Alby, he's to speak like an Italian man but with an asian stereotypical flair? Interesting. HOW CAN SHE RESIST THAT?!

I'd recommend getting bitten by a new breed of spider that grants you spider-like abilities. I would then suggest that you stalk your prey(your girlfriend) and descend down to her from a strand of spidey silk and then give her an amazing kiss while hanging suspended upside down!


^ So original and never ever EVER portrayed in a film. ;)

This thread got really hilarious really fast. :P

Believe it or not kissing is as easy as breathing, as soon as you stop thinking, it will just happen! It's one of the most natural things in the world, humans have been doing it for millennia, it is engrained in your very genes, and you WILL do it just fine :) Just as when a car is approaching you naturally jump out of the way to save your life, when you're close enough to a pretty girl, your kissing mechanism will take over!! You can actually make breathing complicated if you think about it too much. Go with the flow, look into her eyes, think about how pretty she is, and the rest will follow :)

Okay thanks guys, tommorow is the day.
Yeah I just go for it, but one thing anyone close to this girl knows about her is that she is a very phsycially affectiant person, she hugs all her good friends, but only holds hand and kisses her boyfriend. SO I dont think in the future I will have any trouble hugging her if I feel like it. SO pumped for tommorow. And when we kissed the other day, it happened so fast I had no idea what happened, and I mean seriously I wasnt expecting it al alll....I WAS WEARING A JUDO GI AND UGG BOATS!....super classy....
Thankyou guys for your help on this, it is much appreciated, Im pretty sure you guys dont want to know about my realthinship problems and try to explain to me to kiss...unless you do....then you do. I would ask my close friends not my online buddies, but none of my firends, zilch, zero have experience in this, except her and I cant really ask my date for dating advice. ...actually now that I think about it I know two people with experience, one of them is one of my life long friends who does judo with me (we started togther) he and his gf have been going out for 4 months, and seem perfect for each other, I might ask him for some tips tonight. and my other friend who has had expereince is.....a high school drop out, who thinks hes a complete gansta, abuses his friends, cant keep a girl firend, and has had 9 this year and each he has made hepas of stautes on facebook about saying how he loves her then they have a fight and breakup and a week later his got another....so you can see why I dont ask him...
Anyway I will shut up now,
shall I tell you guys how everything goes tommorow, or dont you want to know?

I think I speak for everyone when I say: YES TELL US! We are reading and responding to this thread for a reason! Everyone who does is interested and/or cares. If we didn't, then we wouldn't even bother reading it! :) Good luck tomorrow!

about kissing... a romancist would try and kiss her when the mood is JUST right, very silent, very calm, very alone( alone with her that is), but i say you can just very casually say hi, give her a hug, pull her somewhere( or don't) and give her a kiss.

GL with your date Kieran, you are replaying the scenarios i've seen in a book, in case you missed that in one of my earlier posts.

Scineros youve seen in a book..thats creepy. Im going soon, so excited and a little nervous aswell. Hopefully all goes well. when I come back online, I will say how everything went, and weather we plan to go out again. I think I know how to kiss her, but still nervous to, although she gave me motivation. So that shoudl help.

And now Im back.
Today, went I think very well, it went great actually.
After waiting for my friends date who was 20mins late to get there we got lunch, my date didnt have money for both lunch and a movie so I bought a big meal to share with her...she ate most of it, dont care really, I dont eat much anymore anyway.
We then talked for a while before going to choose a movie to watch, we ended seeing twilight. (Yeah manly I know, but I guess it was an appropraite choice due to the situation)
We had 20 mins to kill so....long story short, the girls painted of our nails each... anyone got any nail polish remover?
We saw the movie, whcih want to bad I guess. Then we went home, me and my date went to the same bus stop so we got to talk a little longer.
SO it went pretty well, and I think we may be going for another.

Oh and during the movies, me and my firend and our dates we being very close with eack other, like mine was resting her head on my shoulder, you should get the idea, we where being very close. As for kssing each other, she kissed me on the cheek a few times and then I thought stuff it lloked at her and kissed her on the lips....this happened about 4 times....SHES SO PHYSCIALLY AFECTANTE! Not that I mind....

wow, very young relationship indeed, good for you Kelan, now i gotta make plans for January or else i might never have anything remotely similar to the date you've just mentioned.

this whole thread made me go AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

:3

congrats dude. lol ;p

IM KIERAN NOT KELAN!
If you dont have a date similar to mine, to stress about it, this girl as I said is very phsyically affecitonate, I dont know why,she just is, so she feels to the need to hug, hold the hand of, and the one shes goign otu with or she loves a lot. Im not complaning, but I just imagined wed kiss once...not 4 times....